101 Dad Jokes That Will Make the Whole Family Laugh

Looking for dad jokes to make the whole family giggle? You’re in the right place. Here’s a list of 101 original dad jokes that will have the kids cracking up in no time…

Why did the scarecrow win an award_ Because he was outstanding in his field

Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!

What do you call fake spaghetti_ An impasta!

What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!

How does a penguin build its house_ Igloos it together!

How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!

Why did the bicycle fall over_ It was two-tired (2)

Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired!

What did the ocean say to the beach_ Nothing, it just waved

What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved.

Why don't skeletons fight each other_ They don't have the guts

Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.

Why can't your nose be 12 inches long_ Because then it would be a foot!

Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot!

What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire_ Frostbite

What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite.

Why did the math book look sad_ Because it had too many problems

Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.

Why don't eggs tell jokes_ They'd crack each other up!

Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up!

What do you call cheese that isn't yours_ Nacho cheese (2)

What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.

How does a lion greet the other animals in the field_ _Pleased to eat you

How does a lion greet the other animals in the field? “Pleased to eat you.”

Why did the coffee file a police report_ It got mugged

Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.

How do you organize a space party_ You planet (2)

How do you organize a space party? You planet.

Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon_ Because he was outstanding in his field and had a brain

Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon? Because he was outstanding in his field and had a brain.

Why was the big cat disqualified from the race_ Because it was a cheetah (3)

Why was the big cat disqualified from the race? Because it was a cheetah.

What do you call a bear with no teeth_ A gummy bear (2)

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.

Why was the math book always stressed_ It had too many problems to solve

Why was the math book always stressed? It had too many problems to solve.

How does a cucumber become a pickle_ It goes through a jarring experience

How does a cucumber become a pickle? It goes through a jarring experience.

What do you call an alligator in a vest_ An investigator

What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.

How do you make holy water_ You boil the hell out of it

How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.

Why don’t scientists trust atoms_ Because they make up everything! (2)

Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!

What did the grape do when it got stepped on_ Nothing but let out a little wine

What did the grape do when it got stepped on? Nothing but let out a little wine.

Why was the stadium so cool_ It was filled with fans

Why was the stadium so cool? It was filled with fans.

What did one plate say to the other plate_ Lunch is on me

What did one plate say to the other plate? Lunch is on me.

Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants_ In case he got a hole in one (2)

Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.

How do you catch a squirrel_ Climb up a tree and act like a nut!

How do you catch a squirrel? Climb up a tree and act like a nut!

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a dog_ Frostbite (2)

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a dog? Frostbite.

Why did the apple turn red_ Because it saw the salad dressing!

Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!

What’s orange and sounds like a parrot_ A carrot

What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

Why did the math teacher bring a ladder to class_ To reach the high marks

Why did the math teacher bring a ladder to class? To reach the high marks.

Why don't some couples go to the gym_ Because some relationships don't work out (2)

Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.

What do you call a factory that makes good products_ A satisfactory

What do you call a factory that makes good products? A satisfactory.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital Because it felt crummy.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because it felt crummy.

How does a penguin build its house_ Igloos it together!

How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!

What do you call a fish with no eyes_ A fsh (2)

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

Why don’t crabs give to charity_ Because they’re shellfish

Why don’t crabs give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary_ A thesaurus

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

Why did the scarecrow become a neurosurgeon_ Because he was outstanding in his field and had the brains

Why did the scarecrow become a neurosurgeon? Because he was outstanding in his field and had the brains.

Why don't koalas count as bears_ They don't have the right koalafications

Why don’t koalas count as bears? They don’t have the right koalafications.

What did the zero say to the eight_ Nice belt!

What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!

How do you make a tissue dance_ Put a little boogie in it

How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it!

Why did the bicycle fall over_ It was two-tired (3)

Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.

What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet_ Supplies!

What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!

How do you find Will Smith in the snow_ You look for fresh prints

How do you find Will Smith in the snow? You look for fresh prints.

Why was the math teacher sad_ She had too many problems

Why was the math teacher sad? She had too many problems.

How do you organize a space party_ You planet

How do you organize a space party? You planet.

What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room in the house_ The living room

What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room in the house? The living room.

What do you call a snowman with a six-pack_ An abdominal snowman

What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman.

Why did the chicken go to the seance_ To talk to the other side

Why did the chicken go to the seance? To talk to the other side.

Why don’t scientists trust atoms_ Because they make up everything!

Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!

What do you call a group of unorganized cats_ A cat-astrophe

What do you call a group of unorganized cats? A cat-astrophe.

Why did the melon jump into the lake_ It wanted to be a watermelon

Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a watermelon.

How does a penguin build its house_ Igloos it together

How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.

Why did the tomato turn red_ Because it saw the salad dressing!

Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.

Why don’t oysters share their pearls_ Because they’re shellfish

Why don’t oysters share their pearls? Because they’re shellfish.

What did one ocean say to the other ocean_ Nothing, they just waved

What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.

Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher_ There was no chemistry

Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher? There was no chemistry.

How does a cucumber become a pickle_ It goes through a jarring experience

How does a cucumber become a pickle? It goes through a jarring experience.

Why was the math book sad_ It had too many problems

Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems.

What do you call a pig that knows karate_ A pork chop

What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop.

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest_ An investigator

What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.

Why was the big cat disqualified from the race_ Because it was a cheetah (4)

Why was the big cat disqualified from the race? Because it was a cheetah.

What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire_ Frostbite (2)

What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite.

Why did the golfer bring extra pants_ In case he got a hole in one

Why did the golfer bring extra pants? In case he got a hole in one.

Why don't some couples go to the gym_ Because some relationships don't work out

Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.

What did the grape do when it got stepped on_ Nothing but let out a little wine

What did the grape do when it got stepped on? Nothing but let out a little wine.

Why did the scarecrow win an award_ Because he was outstanding in his field!

Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.

How does a lion greet the other animals in the field_ _Pleased to eat you (3)

How does a lion greet the other animals in the field? “Pleased to eat you.”

Why did the coffee file a police report_ It got mugged (3)

Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.

What do you call a bear with no teeth_ A gummy bear (3)

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.

How do you catch a squirrel_ Climb up a tree and act like a nut! (2)

How do you catch a squirrel? Climb up a tree and act like a nut!

Why was the stadium so cool_ It was filled with fans

Why was the stadium so cool? It was filled with fans.

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An investigator.

What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.

How do you make holy water_ You boil the hell out of it

How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.

What do you call fake spaghetti_ An impasta

What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.

Why did the bicycle fall over_ It was two-tired!

Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.

Why did the math book look sad_ Because it had too many problems

Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.

How do you make a tissue dance_ Put a little boogie in it!

How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.

Why don't scientists trust atoms_ Because they make up everything!

Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a dog_ Frostbite (3)

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a dog? Frostbite.

Why was the math book always stressed_ It had too many problems to solve

Why was the math book always stressed? It had too many problems to solve.

How do you make a tissue dance_ Put a little boogie in it!

How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.

What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire_ Frostbite (3)

What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite.

Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants_ In case he got a hole in one

Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.

What do you call a bear with no teeth_ A gummy bear

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.

Why was the big cat disqualified from the race_ Because it was a cheetah

Why was the big cat disqualified from the race? Because it was a cheetah.

Why did the tomato turn red_ Because it saw the salad dressing!

Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.

How do you catch a squirrel_ Climb up a tree and act like a nut! (3)

How do you catch a squirrel? Climb up a tree and act like a nut!

What do you call cheese that isn't yours_ Nacho cheese

What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.

Why did the coffee file a police report_ It got mugged

Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.

Why did the bicycle fall over_ It was two-tired

Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired.

How does a lion greet the other animals in the field_ _Pleased to eat you (2)

How does a lion greet the other animals in the field? “Pleased to eat you.”

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a dog_ Frostbite

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a dog? Frostbite.

Why don't skeletons fight each other_ They don't have the guts

Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
What did the ocean say to the beach_ Nothing, it just waved

What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved.

Why was the math teacher sad_ She had too many problems

Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems.

What do you call a fish with no eyes_ A fsh

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

Why did the scarecrow become a successful musician_ Because he had perfect pitch

Why did the scarecrow become a successful musician? Because he had perfect pitch.

Written by Gabriel Cruz - Foodie, Animal Lover, Slang & Language Enthusiast

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