101 Dad Jokes about Beets

Why don’t beets ever get lost_ Because you always beet a path to them!

Why don’t beets ever get lost? Because you always beet a path to them!

What do you call a beet that’s been out in the sun too long_ A sunburned beetroot

What do you call a beet that’s been out in the sun too long? A sunburned beetroot.

Why was the beet always calm_ It never beet an eye

Why was the beet always calm? It never beet an eye.

How do beets send messages_ By beet-mail!

How do beets send messages? By beet-mail!

Why did the beet blush_ Because it saw the salad dressing!

Why did the beet blush? Because it saw the salad dressing!

What do you call a nosy beet_ A beetnose!

What do you call a nosy beet? A beetnose!

Why did the beet go to jail_ It was caught in a stew

Why did the beet go to jail? It was caught in a stew.

How do you unlock a door in the garden_ With a beet key

How do you unlock a door in the garden? With a beet key.

Why did the beet write a letter_ To say it couldn’t beet seeing you anymore

Why did the beet write a letter? To say it couldn’t beet seeing you anymore.

What’s a beet’s favorite type of music_ Root rock

What’s a beet’s favorite type of music? Root rock.

Why don’t beets ever do well in school_ They keep getting beet

Why don’t beets ever do well in school? They keep getting beet.

What do you get when you cross a beet with a computer_ A running beet

What do you get when you cross a beet with a computer? A running beet.

What’s a beet’s favorite sport_ Beetball

What’s a beet’s favorite sport? Beetball.

Why are beets never lonely_ Because they come in bunches!

Why are beets never lonely? Because they come in bunches!

Why did the beet stop halfway down the road_ It ran out of juice

Why did the beet stop halfway down the road? It ran out of juice.

What do you call a frozen beet_ A beet pop

What do you call a frozen beet? A beet pop.

How do beets stay up to date_ They listen to the beet

How do beets stay up to date? They listen to the beet.

What’s a beet’s favorite game_ Beet the clock

What’s a beet’s favorite game? Beet the clock.

Why did the beet go to the doctor_ It had beetn up

Why did the beet go to the doctor? It had beetn up.

What do you call an exhausted beet_ Beaten down

What do you call an exhausted beet? Beaten down.

Why don’t beets work well as secret agents_ They always turnip too early

Why don’t beets work well as secret agents? They always turnip too early.

What did the beet say to the carrot_ I’m rootin’ for ya!

What did the beet say to the carrot? I’m rootin’ for ya!

Why was the beet so good at sports_ It always played by the roots

Why was the beet so good at sports? It always played by the roots.

Why did the beet marry the carrot_ They were root for each other

Why did the beet marry the carrot? They were root for each other.

What’s a beet’s favorite day of the week_ Beetnesday

What’s a beet’s favorite day of the week? Beetnesday.

How do beets like to travel_ By beetmobile

How do beets like to travel? By beetmobile.

Why do beets never start a fight_ They don’t want to beet around the bush

Why do beets never start a fight? They don’t want to beet around the bush.

What did the beet say at the start of the race_ Lettuce beet them!

What did the beet say at the start of the race? Lettuce beet them!

Why did the beet join the orchestra_ It wanted to play the root note

Why did the beet join the orchestra? It wanted to play the root note.

How do beets greet each other_ “Hey bud, what’s rooting_”

How do beets greet each other? “Hey bud, what’s rooting?”

What do you call a group of musical beets_ A beet band

What do you call a group of musical beets? A beet band.

Why did the beet start a bakery It had a passion for beet bread.

Why did the beet start a bakery? It had a passion for beet bread.

What do you call a scared beet_ A beetroot of all evil

What do you call a scared beet? A beetroot of all evil.

Why did the beet stop running_ It couldn’t ketchup

Why did the beet stop running? It couldn’t ketchup.

What do you call a beet with many friends_ A popular beet

What do you call a beet with many friends? A popular beet.

How did the little beet feel after losing its family_ Disbeetraught

How did the little beet feel after losing its family? Disbeetraught.

What do you call a beet that doesn’t work_ Unbeetable

What do you call a beet that doesn’t work? Unbeetable.

Why did the beet write a book_ It had a story that couldn’t be beet

Why did the beet write a book? It had a story that couldn’t be beet.

What’s a beet’s favorite horror movie_ The Beet Witch Project

What’s a beet’s favorite horror movie? The Beet Witch Project.

What do beets argue about_ What’s a-maize-ing and what isn’t

What do beets argue about? What’s a-maize-ing and what isn’t.

Why did the beet go to the party_ To turnip the beet!

Why did the beet go to the party? To turnip the beet!

What do you call a lazy beet_ A couch po-ta-to

What do you call a lazy beet? A couch po-ta-to.

Why did the beet sit in the corner_ It couldn’t handle the pressure cooker

Why did the beet sit in the corner? It couldn’t handle the pressure cooker.

What do you call a beet after a workout_ Sweaty and beet-red

What do you call a beet after a workout? Sweaty and beet-red.

Why was the beet so good at boxing_ It always beet its opponents

Why was the beet so good at boxing? It always beet its opponents.

What’s a beet’s favorite Shakespeare play_ The Merchant of Beetness

What’s a beet’s favorite Shakespeare play? The Merchant of Beetness.

Why do beets make good detectives_ They always get to the root of the problem

Why do beets make good detectives? They always get to the root of the problem.

What did the beet say when it got promoted_ I’m ready to turnip the heat!

What did the beet say when it got promoted? I’m ready to turnip the heat!

Why did the beet join a band_ It wanted to hit the high roots

Why did the beet join a band? It wanted to hit the high roots.

What do you call a beet’s best friend_ A spud buddy

What do you call a beet’s best friend? A spud buddy.

Why did the beet turn red_ Because it saw the garden salad!

Why did the beet turn red? Because it saw the garden salad!

How do beets like to relax_ By vegging out

How do beets like to relax? By vegging out.

What did the beet say to the potato_ “Rooting for you!”

What did the beet say to the potato? “Rooting for you!”

Why did the beet stop in the middle of the road_ It saw a fork up ahead

Why did the beet stop in the middle of the road? It saw a fork up ahead.

What’s a beet’s favorite kind of trip_ A root trip

What’s a beet’s favorite kind of trip? A root trip.

Why was the beet always chosen for teams_ It was never beet

Why was the beet always chosen for teams? It was never beet.

How do you make a beet disappear_ Put a pea in front of it

How do you make a beet disappear? Put a pea in front of it.

What’s a beet’s favorite kind of show_ A root-ality TV show

What’s a beet’s favorite kind of show? A root-ality TV show.

Why don’t beets get along with potatoes_ They’re always competing for the spotlight

Why don’t beets get along with potatoes? They’re always competing for the spotlight.

What’s a beet’s favorite exercise_ Squash

What’s a beet’s favorite exercise? Squash.

Why did the beet go to the art gallery_ To get some culture

Why did the beet go to the art gallery? To get some culture.

What do you call an angry beet A beet-off.

What do you call an angry beet? A beet-off.

What do beets call their grandparents_ Grandroots

What do beets call their grandparents? Grandroots.

How do beets stay secret_ They whisper in your ear

How do beets stay secret? They whisper in your ear.

Why did the beet fail the exam_ It couldn't get to the root of the problems

Why did the beet fail the exam? It couldn’t get to the root of the problems.

What do you call a beet that's been knighted_ Sir Beet-a-lot

What do you call a beet that’s been knighted? Sir Beet-a-lot.

Why do beets make great reporters_ They always dig deeper

Why do beets make great reporters? They always dig deeper.

What do beets wear to the beach_ Swimming roots

What do beets wear to the beach? Swimming roots.

How do you catch a runaway beet_ Chase it down the garden path

How do you catch a runaway beet? Chase it down the garden path.

Why was the beet invited to the party_ Because it knows how to raise the beet!

Why was the beet invited to the party? Because it knows how to raise the beet!

What did the beet say to the turnip_ _You turn-ip, I'll beet down!

What did the beet say to the turnip? “You turn-ip, I’ll beet down!”

What do you get when you cross a beet with a computer_ A root reboot

What do you get when you cross a beet with a computer? A root reboot.

How do you make a beet stand up_ Say, “Lettuce beet gravity!”

How do you make a beet stand up? Say, “Lettuce beet gravity!”

Why did the beet get a job at the electronics store_ It was good at charging batteries

Why did the beet get a job at the electronics store? It was good at charging batteries.

Why don't beets get invited to movies_ They always root for the villain

Why don’t beets get invited to movies? They always root for the villain.

What's a beet's favorite type of investment_ Root stocks

What’s a beet’s favorite type of investment? Root stocks.

What's a beet's favorite action movie_ Die Hard, with a Beet-geance

What’s a beet’s favorite action movie? Die Hard, with a Beet-geance.

What do beets say when something is easy_ “It’s no big dill!”

What do beets say when something is easy? “It’s no big dill!”

Why did the beet write a motivational book_ To inspire others to beet their best

Why did the beet write a motivational book? To inspire others to beet their best.

What did the old beet say to the young beet_ _You're such a sprout!

What did the old beet say to the young beet? “You’re such a sprout!”

How do beets communicate in secret_ They use Morse code

How do beets communicate in secret? They use Morse code.

Why did the beet go to the dance_ It heard the DJ was playing beet-bopping tunes

Why did the beet go to the dance? It heard the DJ was playing beet-bopping tunes.

What do you call a very smart beet_ A brainroot

What do you call a very smart beet? A brainroot.

Why did the beet win the vegetable award_ It was unbeetable in all categories!

Why did the beet win the vegetable award? It was unbeetable in all categories!

How do you cheer up a sad beet_ Give it a beet hug!

How do you cheer up a sad beet? Give it a beet hug!

Why don't beets work late_ They believe in early root-irement

Why don’t beets work late? They believe in early root-irement.

What's a beet's favorite kind of weather_ When it’s raining root beer

What’s a beet’s favorite kind of weather? When it’s raining root beer.

Why did the beet join a music band_ It wanted to play the root-ar

Why did the beet join a music band? It wanted to play the root-ar.

What do you call a beet with an attitude_ A snappy root

What do you call a beet with an attitude? A snappy root.

Why did the beet go to the hospital_ It lost its roots

Why did the beet go to the hospital? It lost its roots.

What did the beet say during a race_ “Beet you to the finish line!”

What did the beet say during a race? “Beet you to the finish line!”

What do you call a beet in a blender_ A beetnik

What do you call a beet in a blender? A beetnik.

Why did the beet get a ticket_ It breezed through a root light

Why did the beet get a ticket? It breezed through a root light.

How do you describe a fancy beet_ Beet-utiful

How do you describe a fancy beet? Beet-utiful.

Why do beets never start a fight_ They prefer to hash it out

Why do beets never start a fight? They prefer to hash it out.

What do beets do when they get home_ They root down

What do beets do when they get home? They root down.

Why did the beet join the army_ It wanted to be a root-sergeant

Why did the beet join the army? It wanted to be a root-sergeant.

How do you organize a beet party_ You turnip the music and beet it!

How do you organize a beet party? You turnip the music and beet it!

Why was the beet a good mathematician_ It was great at square roots

Why was the beet a good mathematician? It was great at square roots.

What do beets do on New Year’s Eve_ They toast to a fruitful year

What do beets do on New Year’s Eve? They toast to a fruitful year.

Why did the beet stop at the bar_ To get beet-er acquainted with the locals

Why did the beet stop at the bar? To get beet-er acquainted with the locals.

Written by Gabriel Cruz - Foodie, Animal Lover, Slang & Language Enthusiast

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