Why did the black bean start a band? Because it had the best musical toots!
What do you call a black bean that’s into technology? A robo-bean.
Why don’t black beans ever get lost? They always find their way back to the chili pot.
How do black beans leave a party? They say, “It’s bean real!”
What do you call a black bean with superpowers? A super-legume!
Why was the black bean so good at baseball? It always hit below the belt!
What’s a black bean’s favorite kind of music? Anything with a good beat!
Why are black beans terrible liars? You can always spill the beans!
How do black beans say goodbye? “See you later, refried-gator!”
Why did the black bean go to therapy? It had too much emotional bag-gage!
What do you call an artistic black bean? A graphic bean-er!
How do black beans keep their secrets? They keep them under wraps!
What’s a black bean’s favorite exercise? The jump bean!
Why did the black bean write a book? To spill the beans!
How do black beans stay young? By avoiding the can!
What do black beans do when they get angry? They stew!
Why don’t black beans play poker? Too many toots give them away!
What do you call a group of musical black beans? A jazz ensemble.
What do black beans wear to a wedding? Black ties!
How do you impress a black bean? Be en-chilada fun!
Why was the black bean so sad? It missed its can-mates.
What do you call a black bean detective? Sherlock Hominy.
Why are black beans great for diets? They’re lean, mean, fiber machines!
What’s a black bean’s favorite horror movie? Silence of the Yams!
How do you make a black bean laugh? Crack a corn-y joke!
What’s a black bean’s life motto? “Live and let fry!”
What do black beans do on a first date? They try not to spill too much!
How did the black bean become a superstar? By being in the spotlight!
What’s a black bean’s favorite Shakespeare play? “Julius Caesar Salad.”
Why do black beans make good astronauts? They’re always ready for launch!
What do black beans say when they answer the phone? “Yellow?”
Why did the black bean start meditating? To find its inner peas.
How do black beans succeed? By pulling themselves up by their beanstraps.
What did the black bean say to the chickpea? “Hummus be friends!”
Why do black beans never start trouble? They’re afraid of getting smashed.
What do black beans wear to bed? Their pajama beans!
Why did the black bean go to the art gallery? To bean-spire!
What do you call a black bean that’s always cold? A chili bean.
How do black beans celebrate their birthdays? With a bunt cake!
Why don’t black beans play hide and seek? Because they’re always peaking!
What did the black bean say after a great meal? “That hit the spot!”
How do black beans travel? In a carpool.
Why was the black bean always happy? It lived in high spirits!
What do you call an overworked black bean? Stressed and pressed.
How do black beans apologize? They re-fry their best.
Why did the black bean go to school? To become a has-bean.
What do black beans read in the morning? The Daily Spread.
Why are black beans great at chess? They always know the next move.
How do black beans propose? “Will you bean mine?”
What’s a black bean’s favorite kind of trip? A guilt trip—because they’re always being blamed!
How do black beans stay cool? They hang out by the dip!
What’s a black bean’s favorite gymnastic move? The bean flip.
Why did the black bean refuse to play basketball? It was afraid of getting dunked!
What do black beans say when they’re shocked? “Holy frijoles!”
What did the black bean say to the avocado? “Let’s guac ‘n’ roll!”
Why did the black bean stop working? It was canned!
What do you call a black bean on a skateboard? A rollin’ bean.
How do you know if a black bean is in a good mood? It’ll give you a grin!
What do you call a black bean at the beach? A sand bean.
Why did the black bean join the choir? It had a hearty pitch!
What’s a black bean’s favorite magic spell? Bean-o!
Why did the black bean go to the party? To shake its bean-stalk!
What do black beans say before dinner? “Lettuce pray.”
How do black beans like their office? With plenty of legume!
What do you call a black bean with a cold? Achoo-lentil!
How did the black bean greet the lentil? “Nice to eat you!”
What did the black bean bring to the barbecue? Buns and burgers!
How do black beans stay informed? They keep tabs on the peas!
What do you call a black bean that writes poems? A poetic bean.
Why don’t black beans get stressed? They keep their cool in the can!
What did the black bean say at the race? “Eat my dust!”
How do black beans deal with their enemies? They hash it out.
Why was the black bean always invited to games? It was good at spilling the beans!
What do you call a black bean that’s been to space? A meteor-bean.
How do black beans like their news? No spin, just the facts!
What do you call a smart black bean? A brain-bean.
What’s a black bean’s favorite day of the week? Fry-day!
Why don’t black beans get along with garlic? Because garlic is too a-peeling!
How do black beans stay safe? They use their bean belt!
Why did the black bean start a blog? To share the scoop!
How do you get a black bean’s attention? Scream “Supper’s ready!”
Why did the black bean go to the gym? To get baked!
What do you call a group of singing black beans? The Black Eyed Peas!
What’s a black bean’s favorite opera? “Bean Giovanni.”
How do black beans sign their letters? “Lentil next time!”
Why don’t black beans get invited on road trips? They might gas up the place!
What did the black bean say to the sweet potato? “Let’s mash up!”
Why was the black bean so popular? Because it was well-refried!
How do black beans leave the bar? Three sheets to the wind!
What do black beans do when they break up? They split the peas!
How do black beans like to relax? In a bean bag chair!
Why did the black bean wear a disguise? It was a has-bean!
What did the black bean say when it won a trophy? “I’m so bean-ered!”
Why did the black bean go to a psychic? To find out its destiny!
What do you call a black bean in a hurry? Fast food!
Why was the black bean always calm? It never let things get under its skin!
What did the black bean wear to the wedding? A tux and tails!
Why did the black bean refuse to dance? It had two left feet!
What’s a black bean’s favorite way to travel? In a stew!
Why don’t black beans play hide and seek? They always spill the beans!
How did the black bean feel after a day at the spa? Re-fried and rejuvenated!