Flower Puns and Jokes

Why do flowers always drive so fast_ They put the petal to the metal!

Why do flowers always drive so fast? They put the petal to the metal!

Can February March_ No, but April Mayflower!

Can February March? No, but April Mayflower!

What did the big flower say to the little flower_ Hey, bud!

What did the big flower say to the little flower? Hey, bud!

I’m no garden variety, I’m a unique bloom

I’m no garden variety, I’m a unique bloom.

Why was the flower so good at problem-solving_ It knew how to nip things in the bud

Why was the flower so good at problem-solving? It knew how to nip things in the bud.

I’m just pollen your leg!

I’m just pollen your leg!

What do you call a flower that runs on electricity_ A power plant!

What do you call a flower that runs on electricity? A power plant!

I tried to catch some fog. I mist, but I rose to the occasion

I tried to catch some fog. I mist, but I rose to the occasion.

How do flowers kiss_ With their tulips

How do flowers kiss? With their tulips.

I’m rooting for you!

I’m rooting for you!

Why did the flower take a break_ It was feeling a little potted

Why did the flower take a break? It was feeling a little potted.

Time to turnip the garden and squash the competition

Time to turnip the garden and squash the competition.

What's a flower's favorite vegetable_ Cauliflower!

What’s a flower’s favorite vegetable? Cauliflower!

Don't worry, bee happy. The flowers are blooming!

Don’t worry, bee happy. The flowers are blooming!

How do you know flowers are capable of kissing_ They have tulips!

How do you know flowers are capable of kissing? They have tulips!

Let’s put our tulips together!

Let’s put our tulips together!

Why did the flower go back to school_ To improve its “buds.”

Why did the flower go back to school? To improve its “buds.”

Thistle be the best day ever!

Thistle be the best day ever!

Why don't flowers ever get lonely_ Because they come in bunches!

Why don’t flowers ever get lonely? Because they come in bunches!

A peony for your thoughts

A peony for your thoughts?

What did the flower write in his mom's card_ I'm pollen for you!

What did the flower write in his mom’s card? I’m pollen for you!

Let’s have some blooming fun!

Let’s have some blooming fun!

Why was the flower always invited to parties_ Because it was a blooming good time

Why was the flower always invited to parties? Because it was a blooming good time.

You’re simply radishing!

You’re simply radishing!

What’s a flower’s favorite sport_ Budminton

What’s a flower’s favorite sport? Budminton.

We’re mint to be friends

We’re mint to be friends.

How do flowers whistle_ Through their bloomers!

How do flowers whistle? Through their bloomers!

Let’s stick together like buds in a bloom

Let’s stick together like buds in a bloom.

What’s worse than raining cats and dogs_ Hailing taxis, unless you’re a sunflower!

What’s worse than raining cats and dogs? Hailing taxis, unless you’re a sunflower!

Iris you all the happiness in the world!

Iris you all the happiness in the world!

What do you get when you plant kisses_ Tulips!

What do you get when you plant kisses? Tulips!

Life is gourd but better with flowers

Life is gourd but better with flowers.

Why do flowers always stick together_ Because they have _petal-larity

Why do flowers always stick together? Because they have “petal-larity.”

If friends were flowers, I’d pick you

If friends were flowers, I’d pick you.

What type of socks do flowers wear_ They don't wear socks; they have plantar fasciitis!

What type of socks do flowers wear? They don’t wear socks; they have plantar fasciitis!

I lilac you a lot!

I lilac you a lot!

What did the flower say to its child_ I’m so proud, I could poppy!

What did the flower say to its child? I’m so proud, I could poppy!

Our friendship is blossoming

Our friendship is blossoming.

What’s a flower’s favorite Journey song_ “Don’t Stop Be-leafing.”

What’s a flower’s favorite Journey song? “Don’t Stop Be-leafing.”

This might be cornflower, but it’s amaizing!

This might be cornflower, but it’s amaizing!

What did one flower say to another flower on Valentine’s Day? I’m rooting for you!

I’m not a big fan of steps—they always seem so coneflowering.

Why was the flower so grumpy? It had too many buds in its bloom!

Let’s make this a blooming good day.

Why did the gardener plant light bulbs? He wanted to grow a power plant!

I’m just pollen your chain!

What do you call flowers who are BFFs? Buds forever!

What in carnation is going on here?

Why did the flower join Tinder? It wanted to find its “pollen” soulmate.

I’m feeling dandy, and I ain’t lion!

What is a flower’s favorite type of story? A budding romance.

Petal down, it’s not that serious!

Why are flowers so good at problem-solving? They know how to take things step by petal.

I’ll never desert you, my succulent friend.

How does a flower ride a bike? By pedaling its petals!

Be-leaf me, you’re fantastic.

Be-leaf me, you’re fantastic.

What do you call a lazy flower? A daisy!

You’re the pick of the patch!

What kind of flower is on your face? Tulips!

You had me at aloe.

What do you call a country where everyone has to smile? A flower-nation.

Thistle be our little secret.

How do flowers greet each other? “Hey, bud, what’s blooming?”

Y’orchid-ing me!

What did the flower say when he was complimented? “I’m just doing my budding best!”

You’re unbe-leaf-able.

Why did the flower take a ladder to work? It wanted to reach new heights.

It’s party thyme, let’s raisin the roof!

What do you call a well-dressed lion? Dandelion.

Don’t stop beleafing!

What do flowers study in school? Stem.

Peas out, it’s time to leaf!

How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut, or better yet, a flower!

You’re my best bud.

Why did the flower love the sun? It helped it blossom!

Lettuce celebrate!

What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a rose? A collie-flower!

O-live you so much.

Why did the flower start an acting career? It was destined for bloom and gloom dramas.

You make me feel fern-tastic!

What did the boy flower say to the girl flower on Valentine’s Day? “I really dig you!”

Hope thistle cheer you up!

What’s a flower’s favorite kind of dog? A bud-dog.

Have an unbe-leaf-ably good day!

Why did the flower get in trouble in school? For budding in line.

Don’t kale my vibe

Don’t kale my vibe.

What did the flower do when it got caught cheating_ It tried to weed its way out

What did the flower do when it got caught cheating? It tried to weed its way out.

Bloom where you are planted

Bloom where you are planted.

Why did the flower go to therapy_ It had petal issues

Why did the flower go to therapy? It had petal issues.

Sometimes you just gotta go with the phloem.

Sometimes you just gotta go with the phloem.

What did the romantic flower write in its Valentine's card_ _I'm pollen for you

What did the romantic flower write in its Valentine’s card? “I’m pollen for you.”

I’m a succa for you!

I’m a succa for you!

Why don’t flowers get good cell service_ Too many buds on the line

Why don’t flowers get good cell service? Too many buds on the line.

Let’s take a leaf of faith together.

Let’s take a leaf of faith together.

Why did the flower always ace its tests_ It knew all the “anthers.”

Why did the flower always ace its tests? It knew all the “anthers.”

Thanks for beeing such a great friend.

Thanks for beeing such a great friend.

What do you call a group of young flowers playing instruments_ A bud band

What do you call a group of young flowers playing instruments? A bud band.

I’m not pollen your leg, you’re awesome!

I’m not pollen your leg, you’re awesome!

What do flowers love to watch in the evening_ Bloom operas!

What do flowers love to watch in the evening? Bloom operas!

You’re so beautiful, even the flowers are jealous.

You’re so beautiful, even the flowers are jealous.

Written by Gabriel Cruz - Foodie, Animal Lover, Slang & Language Enthusiast

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