Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up!
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite!
How do you organize a space party? You planet!
Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems.
What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
Why did the bicycle fall over? It was two-tired!
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!
Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs!
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a dog? Frostpaw!
Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted!
What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping? A dino-snore!
Why did the student eat his homework? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
What did one wall say to the other? I’ll meet you at the corner!
What do you call a fish without eyes? Fsh!
What did the zero say to the eight? Nice belt!
What is brown and sticky? A stick!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one!
What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain!
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired!
What has ears but cannot hear? A cornfield!
What gets wetter the more it dries? A towel!
What kind of dog keeps the best time? A watch dog!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because it felt crummy!
What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant!
What kind of key opens a banana? A monkey!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
Why don’t oysters donate to charity? Because they are shellfish!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
What has keys but can’t open locks? A piano!
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one!
What has one head, one foot, and four legs? A bed!
Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed!
What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick!
Why did the computer go to the doctor? It had a virus!
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer!
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus!
What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner is on me!
Why did the kid bring a ladder to school? Because she wanted to go to high school!
What building in New York has the most stories? The public library!
What do you call a factory that makes okay products? A satisfactory!
Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up!
What did the limestone say to the geologist? Don’t take me for granite!
What do you call a group of unorganized cats? A cat-tastrophe!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk!
What kind of music do mummies listen to? Wrap music!
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!
Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out!
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
Why did the student eat his homework? Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
What do you call an old snowman? Water!
What is a computer’s favorite snack? Computer chips!
What do you call a bear with no socks on? Barefoot!
What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman? Frostbite!
What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? Bison!
What do you call a funny mountain? Hill-arious!
Why do bicycles fall over? Because they are two-tired!
What did the grape do when he got stepped on? He let out a little wine!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping? A dino-snore!
What do you get when you cross a fridge with a radio? Cool music!
Why did the picture go to jail? Because it was framed!
What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador!
Why did the computer go to the doctor? It had a virus!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant!
What kind of dog keeps the best time? A watch dog!
What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie? A python!
What did the banana say to the dog? Nothing, bananas can’t talk!
What has ears but cannot hear? A cornfield!
What is a witch’s favorite subject in school? Spelling!
What do you call two birds in love? Tweethearts!
What time is it when the clock strikes 13? Time to get a new clock!
Why did the belt get arrested? For holding up a pair of pants!
What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain!
What do you call a fish with two knees? A tunee fish!
What did one wall say to the other? I’ll meet you at the corner!
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired!
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
What do you call a boomerang that won’t come back? A stick!
What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree!
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because it felt crummy!
What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator!
What gets wetter the more it dries? A towel!
What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
What has keys but can’t open locks? A piano!
Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!