Pregnancy can be a rollercoaster ride filled with emotional ups and downs, physical changes, and unexpected surprises. Whether you’re experiencing morning sickness, swollen ankles, or simply trying to navigate the new and exciting world of parenthood, there’s no denying that being pregnant can be both exciting and challenging. In times like these, a good sense of humor can go a long way. So, if you’re looking for some laughs to get you through those tough moments, we’ve compiled a list of 100 funny quotes about being pregnant that are sure to put a smile on your face. From witty one-liners to hilarious observations, these quotes are perfect for anyone who’s looking to add a little humor to their pregnancy journey. So sit back, relax, and get ready to laugh your way through this incredible experience!
100 Funny Quotes About Being Pregnant
- “Labor is like a long, intense workout…except instead of gaining muscle, you gain a baby.”
- “Giving birth is the ultimate test of a woman’s strength and endurance. And I passed…but just barely.”
- “It’s called labor for a reason…because it’s a lot of work and you don’t get paid for it!”
- “Why do they call it the miracle of birth? I think ‘the insanity of birth’ is a more accurate description.”
- “I may have a bump, but I can still rock a crop top!”
- “My bump is like a personal shelf – perfect for holding snacks.”
- “Who needs a purse when you have a bump?”
- “I’ve got 99 problems, but my bump ain’t one.”
- “The pain of childbirth is like nothing else I’ve ever experienced…except maybe stepping on a Lego in the middle of the night.”
- “Giving birth is like running a marathon…except you’re doing it with a bowling ball between your legs.”
- “They say childbirth is beautiful…but I don’t remember seeing anything beautiful through the haze of pain and exhaustion.”
- “I never knew my pain threshold until I went through labor. Turns out, it’s pretty high…but not high enough to make me want to do it again anytime soon.”
- “Childbirth is like a giant game of Jenga. You never know which piece is going to make everything come crashing down.”
- “The pain of labor is like a rite of passage…but can we skip it and just get a participation trophy instead?”
- “It’s funny how during childbirth you can simultaneously feel like a superhero and a victim.”
- “They say giving birth is a natural process…but so is diarrhea and that’s not exactly pleasant either.”
- “Labor pains are like the worst period cramps you’ve ever had…multiplied by a thousand.”
- “Giving birth is like trying to run a marathon while also doing a high-intensity interval training workout.”
- “The pain of childbirth is temporary…but the memory of it lasts a lifetime.”
- “Childbirth is like a rollercoaster ride…except there’s no getting off until the end.”
- “I never thought I’d be able to handle the pain of childbirth…but then I became a mother and realized I can handle anything.”
- “If giving birth was easy, men would do it too.”
- “The pain of labor is like a badge of honor for mothers…but I’ll stick to getting my badges from Girl Scouts, thanks.”
- “Childbirth is like an extreme sport…except there’s no championship trophy at the end, just a baby.”
- “I’m not fat, I’m just growing as a human!”
- “I have a bump, and I’m not afraid to use it!”
- “I can’t see my feet, but I know they’re down there somewhere.”
- “My belly is a badge of honor, earned one kick at a time.”
- “I’m not pregnant, I’m just smuggling a watermelon.”
- “My bump is like a magic 8-ball – ask me a question and I’ll give you a kick.”
- “I’m not getting bigger, I’m just blossoming into motherhood.”
- “I’m not bloated, I’m just in the early stages of bump-dom.”
- “My bump is my daily reminder that I’m growing a tiny human!”
- “I may have a bump, but that’s just more of me to love.”
- “My bump is like a superhero suit – giving me the power to create life!”
- “Sleep? Who needs sleep? I’m busy growing a human over here.”
- “Why do they call it ‘morning’ sickness? It should be called ’24/7′ sickness.”
- “My baby is already training me for those sleepless newborn nights.”
- “I finally figured out why they call it ‘counting sheep’ – because it never works!”
- “I used to count down the hours until bedtime, now I just count the hours until my next bathroom break.”
- “I’m convinced that pregnancy insomnia was invented just to prepare us for the sleepless nights ahead.”
- “Who needs caffeine when you have pregnancy insomnia?”
- “I’ve never been so exhausted and so wide awake at the same time.”
- “Pregnancy insomnia: when you’re too tired to move, but too awake to sleep.”
- “I’ve traded my dreams for trips to the bathroom.”
- “Sleep is for the weak… and the non-pregnant.”
- “I’m pretty sure I’m not even human anymore, just a walking zombie.”
- “I thought the hardest part of pregnancy was over after the morning sickness ended… boy, was I wrong!”
- “If I don’t get some sleep soon, I might just start hallucinating that the baby is already here.”
- “I never realized how much I took sleep for granted until I got pregnant.”
- “I’ve never been so excited for a nap in my life.”
- “My bump is proof that miracles do exist.”
- “My bump may be big, but so is my love for this baby.”
- “I have a VIP guest in my belly – and he’s kicking up a storm!”
- “I’ve got a whole lotta love in my bump!”
- “My bump is like a big, cozy pillow – perfect for napping on the go.”
- “Who needs a bedtime routine when you have pregnancy insomnia?”
- “I’d love to ‘sleep like a baby,’ but that’s not happening until after the baby arrives.”
- “I’ve come to accept that the only thing I’m getting a good night’s sleep on is my pregnancy pillow.”
- “I don’t know what’s worse – the insomnia or the crazy dreams that come with it.”
- “I used to have a photographic memory, but now I have a Polaroid that never develops.”
- “Pregnancy brain is like having a browser with too many tabs open. You know you had that one thought, but now it’s lost in a sea of tabs.”
- “I’m not forgetful, I’m just experiencing selective amnesia thanks to pregnancy brain.”
- “Pregnancy brain is like a broken record player. You keep repeating yourself, but you can’t remember what you just said.”
- “I swear my brain cells are on maternity leave.”
- “I’m not losing my mind, I’m just experiencing a brain fart thanks to pregnancy brain.”
- “Pregnancy brain is like a faulty GPS. You think you know where you’re going, but you always end up getting lost.”
- “I can remember the lyrics to every song from the ’90s, but I can’t remember what I ate for breakfast this morning.”
- “Pregnancy brain is like playing a game of hide-and-seek with your own thoughts.”
- “I’m not forgetful, I’m just living in a perpetual state of baby brain.”
- “Pregnancy brain is like trying to find a needle in a haystack, except the needle is your thought and the haystack is your brain.”
- “I’m pretty sure I’ve lost more brain cells during pregnancy than I did in college.”
- “Pregnancy brain is like trying to solve a Rubik’s Cube with missing pieces.”
- “I can’t remember if I’m supposed to be nesting or hibernating.”
- “Pregnancy brain is like trying to drive with a broken GPS and a blindfold on.”
- “I’m not forgetful, I’m just experiencing an extended senior moment thanks to pregnancy brain.”
- “Pregnancy brain is like a computer with too many programs running at once. It freezes, crashes, and shuts down all at the same time.”
- “I can’t remember my own phone number, but I can recite every line from my favorite rom-com.”
- “Pregnancy brain is like a game of telephone with your own thoughts. By the time you remember what you were thinking, it’s completely different.”
- “I’m not forgetful, I’m just experiencing a permanent brain hiccup thanks to pregnancy.”
- “I’m not fat, I’m just growing a future member of society.”
- “Pregnancy cravings are a superpower. I can smell a pickle from a mile away.”
- “My belly is like a crystal ball. Everyone wants to rub it for good luck.”
- “I’m not nesting, I’m just trying to clean up the hurricane that hit my house.”
- “Why do people say ‘sleep like a baby’ when clearly they’ve never been pregnant?”
- “I can’t wait to meet the little person who’s been kicking me in the ribs for weeks.”
- “My water broke, but I still have to finish this bag of chips.”
- “Pregnancy: the only time in life when you can’t blame the extra weight on holiday feasting.”
- “If my pregnancy hormones were a person, they’d be on the FBI’s Most Wanted list.”
- “I’m not bloated, I’m just experiencing a second puberty.”
- “Pregnancy: when you go from zero to hero (and back to zero) in nine months.”
- “I never knew I could pee this much until I got pregnant.”
- “My pregnancy glow is just a thin layer of sweat from carrying a human furnace.”
- “I have to pee again… said every pregnant woman ever.”
- “Pregnancy: when every stranger suddenly becomes an expert on your life choices.”
- “I’m not moody, I’m just experiencing a prolonged emotional journey.”
- “I don’t always have a baby in my belly, but when I do, I can’t see my feet.”
- “Pregnancy is like a never-ending science experiment, except the subject is you.”
- “I’m not fat, I’m just a walking baby carrier.”
- “My pregnancy brain is so strong, I could forget my own name if it wasn’t tattooed on my arm.”
Tips On How To Use Funny Quotes About Being Pregnant
- Share on social media – Funny quotes about being pregnant are great for sharing on social media. Whether you’re looking to connect with other expecting moms or just want to make your friends laugh, these quotes are perfect for sharing on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or any other platform.
- Add to a baby shower gift – If you’re looking for a unique way to spruce up your baby shower gift, consider adding a funny quote about being pregnant. You can print it out and attach it to your gift, or even add it to a baby onesie or bib.
- Use in a pregnancy journal – Keeping a pregnancy journal is a great way to document your journey and reflect on your experiences. Adding a funny quote about being pregnant to each entry can help keep things lighthearted and fun.
- Decorate the nursery – If you’re looking to add a touch of humor to your nursery decor, consider printing out a funny quote about being pregnant and framing it. Hang it on the wall for a daily dose of laughter.
- Incorporate into a maternity photo shoot – Maternity photo shoots are a great way to capture this special time in your life. Adding a funny quote about being pregnant to one of your photos can make for a memorable and entertaining shot.