The holiday season is upon us, and what better way to spread the cheer than with a Christmas card? But finding the right words to write in your card can be a daunting task. Luckily, we’ve compiled a list of 100 funny quotes that are sure to make your loved ones laugh. From witty one-liners to humorous observations about the holiday season, these quotes will add some levity to your Christmas greetings. So sit back, grab a cup of cocoa, and get ready to chuckle as we share our favorite funny quotes about Christmas cards.
100 Funny Quotes About Christmas Cards
- “May your holidays be filled with joy, cheer, and copious amounts of eggnog.”
- “Wishing you a Christmas as bright as Rudolph’s nose and a New Year as prosperous as Scrooge McDuck’s vault.”
- “Season’s greetings from our dysfunctional family to yours!”
- “Let’s be real, we’re all just here for the presents.”
- “Why yes, I did wrap myself in Christmas lights for this year’s family photo. Why do you ask?”
- “May your Christmas be merry and your in-laws be bearable.”
- “Sending you warm wishes and a bottle of peppermint schnapps to get you through the holiday season.”
- “I’m dreaming of a white Christmas, but if the white runs out, I’ll drink the red.”
- “Deck the halls with boughs of holly, fa la la la la, la la la la, la la la… you get the idea.”
- “Roses are red, violets are blue, I wrapped my gift with love… and a roll of duct tape too.”
- “Christmas is canceled. Apparently, you told Santa you’ve been good this year. He died laughing.”
- “Who needs snowflakes when you have a cat that sheds like crazy?”
- “My favorite part of Christmas? The part where I get to stuff my face with cookies and blame it on ‘holiday spirit.'”
- “I don’t always celebrate Christmas, but when I do, I prefer to do it with a glass of wine in hand.”
- “All I want for Christmas is a silent night… and maybe a new blender.”
- “Have yourself a merry little Christmas, unless you’re a Grinch. Then, have yourself a completely mediocre Christmas.”
- “The best way to spread Christmas cheer? Stay home and binge-watch Hallmark movies.”
- “May your Christmas be filled with love, laughter, and more ham than you know what to do with.”
- “This Christmas, let’s all remember the true meaning of the holiday: eating until we hate ourselves.”
- “Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way… to the gym on December 26th.”
- “Wishing you a holiday season filled with laughter and joy…and eggnog. Lots of eggnog.”
- “May your Christmas be merry and bright…but not so bright that it blinds you from all the presents!”
- “Wishing you a happy holiday season full of family, friends, and fruitcake (if you’re into that sort of thing).”
- “Merry Christmas! May your stockings be filled with candy canes, coal, and everything in between.”
- “May your Christmas tree be just as lit as your sense of humor.”
- “Sending warm holiday wishes from our family to yours…even if we forgot to include your name on the card.”
- “Wishing you a white Christmas…but if the white stuff turns yellow, we’re not taking responsibility.”
- “May your Christmas dinner be just as chaotic as our family gatherings.”
- “We hope your Christmas is as jolly as our Uncle Bob after a few too many glasses of eggnog.”
- “May your Christmas be filled with laughter, love, and a never-ending supply of Christmas cookies.”
- “Sending you warm wishes and lots of love this holiday season…but we’re still not sharing our Christmas ham.”
- “Wishing you a holly jolly Christmas…and a New Year’s resolution to not eat as much fruitcake next year.”
- “May your Christmas be just as magical as the ones you see in Hallmark movies…minus the cheesy acting.”
- “Wishing you a holiday season filled with peace, love, and lots of terrible Christmas sweaters.”
- “May your Christmas be merry and bright…but not so bright that it wakes up the baby.”
- “Sending our warmest wishes this holiday season…even if we still haven’t found a use for that fruitcake from last year.”
- “Wishing you a Christmas filled with love and laughter…and a few too many awkward family photos.”
- “May your Christmas be filled with joy and cheer…but also a healthy dose of holiday shopping stress.”
- “Sending our love and best wishes this holiday season…and a reminder that the fruitcake stays with us this year.”
- “Wishing you a Christmas that’s as bright as our tree lights…but hopefully without the electrical short circuit.”
- “May your holiday season be filled with more laughter than fruitcake.”
- “I hope your holiday season is as bright as Rudolph’s nose and as merry as Santa’s laugh.”
- “Wishing you a Christmas so merry, even the Grinch would crack a smile.”
- “Here’s to hoping your eggnog is spiked and your jokes are cheesy this holiday season.”
- “May your holiday season be filled with more ho ho hos than headaches.”
- “Sending you warm holiday wishes and a side of sarcasm.”
- “May your holiday season be filled with more cheer than awkward family photos.”
- “Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip this year.”
- “Wishing you a holiday season so bright, you’ll need sunglasses to open your presents.”
- “Merry Christmas! May your holiday season be as joyful as a kid on Christmas morning and as stress-free as a cat in a box.”
- “Here’s to hoping your holiday season is filled with more mistletoe kisses than failed fruitcakes.”
- “May your holiday season be filled with more cookies than calories.”
- “Wishing you a holiday season that’s less awkward than a virtual office Christmas party.”
- “Let’s hope Santa’s reindeer are well-rested, his sleigh is full, and his sense of humor is intact this year.”
- “May your holiday season be filled with more laughter than the last minute holiday rush at the mall.”
- “Sending you holiday cheer and enough Christmas cookies to make Santa jealous.”
- “Wishing you a holiday season so full of joy, your heart might just burst like a Christmas cracker.”
- “May your holiday season be filled with more happiness than a puppy in a pile of wrapping paper.”
- “Here’s to hoping your holiday season is as bright and colorful as a string of Christmas lights (but with fewer tangled wires).”
- “Wishing you a Christmas as merry as a child on Christmas morning. Except, let’s be real, you’re too old to be that excited.”
- “May your holiday season be full of joy and cheer, but mostly full of spiked eggnog.”
- “Here’s hoping your holiday season is full of warmth, love, and passive-aggressive comments from your relatives.”
- “Let’s hope Santa brings you everything you want this year, because let’s face it, you’re too old to be waiting for miracles.”
- “Wishing you a holiday season that’s merry and bright, just like your teeth after all that eggnog.”
- “May your Christmas be filled with love, laughter, and lots of good food. But mostly good food.”
- “Wishing you a Christmas as fabulous as you are, but without the drama and the diva fits.”
- “May your holiday season be merry and bright, just like that tacky sweater you insist on wearing every year.”
- “Wishing you a Christmas that’s as magical as the time you convinced everyone you knew how to wrap presents.”
- “May your holiday season be filled with love, laughter, and plenty of holiday bonuses (yeah, right).”
- “Wishing you a Christmas that’s as delightful as your office’s secret Santa gift exchange.”
- “May your holiday season be full of warmth, love, and good cheer. But mostly good cheer, because let’s be real, we all need a drink after this year.”
- “Wishing you a Christmas that’s as bright as your smile, but without the weird eggnog breath.”
- “May your holiday season be merry and bright, just like that annoying coworker who won’t stop singing Christmas carols.”
- “Wishing you a Christmas that’s as joyous as the time you finally figured out how to use the office printer.”
- “May your holiday season be filled with love, laughter, and plenty of holiday office parties (and hopefully no embarrassing photos).”
- “Wishing you a Christmas that’s as magical as the time you found the last donut in the break room.”
- “May your holiday season be merry and bright, just like the glare from your computer screen that you’re staring at for eight hours a day.”
- “Wishing you a Christmas that’s as sweet as the cookies you brought in for the office (and hopefully no one is allergic).”
- “May your holiday season be filled with love, laughter, and plenty of holiday treats (that you definitely did not steal from the break room).”
- “Wishing you a Christmas filled with so much joy that Santa’s cheeks turn red with envy!”
- “May your holiday season be as jolly as Santa’s rosy cheeks!”
- “Sending you Christmas cheer that will make Santa’s face light up like a Christmas tree!”
- “This Christmas, may your laughter be so infectious that even Santa can’t help but blush!”
- “May your holiday season be filled with so much love that it puts even Santa’s blushing to shame!”
- “Wishing you a Christmas that leaves Santa in awe and blushing with admiration!”
- “May your Christmas be as merry and bright as Santa’s rosy cheeks!”
- “Sending warm holiday wishes that will make Santa blush with delight!”
- “May your Christmas be filled with so much warmth and happiness that it makes even Santa blush!”
- “Here’s to a Christmas that’s so magical, even Santa can’t help but blush with joy!”
- “Wishing you a Christmas that’s full of surprises and enough cheer to make Santa blush with excitement!”
- “May your Christmas be filled with so much love and laughter that Santa’s cheeks hurt from blushing!”
- “Wishing you a Christmas that’s so bright and cheerful that it makes even Santa blush with happiness!”
- “May your holiday season be as magical as Santa’s North Pole workshop, leaving you blushing with wonder!”
- “Here’s to a Christmas that’s so wonderful, it makes even Santa blush with gratitude!”
- “May your Christmas be filled with so much joy that it puts even Santa’s blushing to shame!”
- “Wishing you a holiday season that’s filled with so much love and warmth that it makes Santa’s cheeks turn red!”
- “May your Christmas be as sweet as Santa’s cookies and milk, leaving you blushing with delight!”
- “Wishing you a Christmas that’s filled with so much laughter that it makes even Santa blush with glee!”
- “Tis the season to be jolly, but let’s not get too jolly and end up on Santa’s naughty list!”
- “May your holiday season be as joyful as Santa’s sleigh ride, leaving you blushing with merriment!”
Tips On How To Use Funny Quotes About Christmas Cards
- Match the quote with the recipient – When choosing a funny quote for your Christmas card, consider the personality and sense of humor of the person receiving the card. A quote that might be hilarious to one person might not be as funny to another.
- Keep it light hearted – While it’s great to inject humor into your Christmas cards, it’s important to make sure that the quote doesn’t offend anyone. Stick to lighthearted jokes that everyone can enjoy.
- Pair it with a festive design – A funny quote paired with a festive and colorful design can add an extra layer of cheer to your Christmas card. Consider using a holiday-themed template or designing your own card with graphics and images.
- Add a personal touch – Don’t be afraid to personalize the quote to make it more meaningful to the recipient. You can include an inside joke or reference something special that you both share.
- Keep it short and sweet – Remember that a Christmas card is a small space to work with, so keep the quote short and sweet. A concise and witty quote can be just as effective as a longer one.