Painting Puns and Jokes

Why did the painting go to jail_ It was framed!

Why did the painting go to jail? It was framed!

You've got to brush up on your painting skills

You’ve got to brush up on your painting skills.

What does a painter do to secure their house_ Put on another coat

What does a painter do to secure their house? Put on another coat.

Easel does it!

Easel does it!

Why do artists never win at hide and seek_ Good painters are always spotted

Why do artists never win at hide and seek? Good painters are always spotted.

I'm not a fan of surrealism, but I can draw some conclusions

I’m not a fan of surrealism, but I can draw some conclusions.

What kind of paintings do cows like_ Moo-net

What kind of paintings do cows like? Moo-net.

Artists really know how to frame a conversation.

Artists really know how to frame a conversation.

What’s an artist’s favorite place at school_ The drawing board

What’s an artist’s favorite place at school? The drawing board.

That new art shop is making quite an impressionist

That new art shop is making quite an impressionist.

Why did the painter bring a pencil to bed_ To draw the curtains!

Why did the painter bring a pencil to bed? To draw the curtains!

Let’s get this portrait-y started!

Let’s get this portrait-y started!

What do you call a painting of a cat_ A paw-trait

What do you call a painting of a cat? A paw-trait.

Some artists are traditionally good, but I like the ones who mix it up

Some artists are traditionally good, but I like the ones who mix it up.

Why are artists no good at football_ They keep drawing matches

Why are artists no good at football? They keep drawing matches.

Gogh big or gogh home!

Gogh big or gogh home!

What's orange and sounds like a parrot_ A carrot painting!

What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot painting!

Canvas a few friends to join us at the gallery

Canvas a few friends to join us at the gallery.

How does an artist get into their house_ With a canvas key

How does an artist get into their house? With a canvas key.

Keep calm and carry on painting

Keep calm and carry on painting.

What’s a painter’s favorite drink_ A brush on the rocks

What’s a painter’s favorite drink? A brush on the rocks.

Don't just think outside the box—paint it!

Don’t just think outside the box—paint it!

Why did the painter go to the psychologist_ He had too many strokes

Why did the painter go to the psychologist? He had too many strokes.

Art teachers color the world with creativity

Art teachers color the world with creativity.

How do you discipline a painting_ Give it a good frame

How do you discipline a painting? Give it a good frame.

I’ve got an art studio, where the magic canvas

I’ve got an art studio, where the magic canvas.

Why was the painting always in trouble_ It was a little sketchy

Why was the painting always in trouble? It was a little sketchy.

Don't be afraid to make a little art-ruption

Don’t be afraid to make a little art-ruption.

What did one painting say to the other_ _I’m in the frame of mind for art

What did one painting say to the other? “I’m in the frame of mind for art.”

Life without art is just eh, so let's paint the town!

Life without art is just eh, so let’s paint the town!

What happens when an artist has a bad day_ They lose the art of conversation

What happens when an artist has a bad day? They lose the art of conversation.

I'm quite drawn to your artwork

I’m quite drawn to your artwork.

Why did the painting go on vacation_ It needed a little brush with nature

Why did the painting go on vacation? It needed a little brush with nature.

Paint me like one of your French girls.

Paint me like one of your French girls.

What did the artist wear to the wedding_ A paint suit

What did the artist wear to the wedding? A paint suit.

Always look at the bigger pigment.

Always look at the bigger pigment.

How do paintings stay warm in winter_ They put on another coat of paint

How do paintings stay warm in winter? They put on another coat of paint.

Artists like to brush it off

Artists like to brush it off.

Why was the art book sad_ It had too many problems

Why was the art book sad? It had too many problems.

Palette’s nothing a good painting can’t fix

Palette’s nothing a good painting can’t fix.

How do you get an art student off your porch_ Pay for the pizza

How do you get an art student off your porch? Pay for the pizza.

When in doubt, brush it out.

When in doubt, brush it out.

Why did the artist paint their boat_ To make it seaworthy

Why did the artist paint their boat? To make it seaworthy.

Trying to get the artist’s attention_ Just canvas them!

Trying to get the artist’s attention? Just canvas them!

What do you call an artist who sculpts with metal_ A heavy metal artist

What do you call an artist who sculpts with metal? A heavy metal artist.

That artwork’s so good it was stealing the spotlight, now it’s framed!

That artwork’s so good it was stealing the spotlight, now it’s framed!

Why are art thieves so good at their job_ They can draw a crowd away

Why are art thieves so good at their job? They can draw a crowd away.

I'm a hue man, I love colors

I’m a hue man, I love colors.

What do you get when you cross an artist with a police officer_ A brush with the law

What do you get when you cross an artist with a police officer? A brush with the law.

Artists love misty landscapes—they're quite into the fog-ure.

Artists love misty landscapes—they’re quite into the fog-ure.

Why did the artist put his money in the blender_ He wanted to make liquid assets

Why did the artist put his money in the blender? He wanted to make liquid assets.

We're not playing by the books—we're coloring outside the lines

We’re not playing by the books—we’re coloring outside the lines.

Why do artists always carry pencils_ To sketch out their plans

Why do artists always carry pencils? To sketch out their plans.

I’ve got to paint my mind about this art piece

I’ve got to paint my mind about this art piece.

Why did the artist draw a cow_ He wanted to moo-ve people

Why did the artist draw a cow? He wanted to moo-ve people.

You’re never too old for an artventure

You’re never too old for an artventure.

What’s an artist’s favorite game_ Pictionary

What’s an artist’s favorite game? Pictionary.

Make no mi-stake, only happy accidents

Make no mi-stake, only happy accidents.

Why was the painter afraid he might go to hell_ He had too many sketchy deals

Why was the painter afraid he might go to hell? He had too many sketchy deals.

Don't be afraid to make a scene with your paintings

Don’t be afraid to make a scene with your paintings.

What did the competitive painter say to his rival_ _I challenge you to a draw!

What did the competitive painter say to his rival? “I challenge you to a draw!”

Artists never dye, they just fade away

Artists never dye, they just fade away.

How do artists greet each other_ _Yellow, how blue you

How do artists greet each other? “Yellow, how blue you?”

You need more art-itude!

You need more art-itude!

What do artists do when they get cold_ Stand closer to the heater and draw warmth

What do artists do when they get cold? Stand closer to the heater and draw warmth.

Every canvas is a journey all its own

Every canvas is a journey all its own.

Why do artists always carry a pencil behind their ear_ In case they come across a good sketch

Why do artists always carry a pencil behind their ear? In case they come across a good sketch.

Artists believe in a thing called art.

Artists believe in a thing called art.

What did the artist say after finishing a painting_ _It’s easel-y my best work!

What did the artist say after finishing a painting? “It’s easel-y my best work!”

That landscape painting is hill-arious

That landscape painting is hill-arious.

Why did the artist marry his muse_ She painted his life in beautiful colors

Why did the artist marry his muse? She painted his life in beautiful colors.

I'm not lion, that animal portrait is great!

I’m not lion, that animal portrait is great!

Why don't artists ever lose_ Because they know all the angles

Why don’t artists ever lose? Because they know all the angles.

If you can’t draw with the big dogs, stay on the porch

If you can’t draw with the big dogs, stay on the porch.

What’s an artist’s favorite mode of transportation_ A paint van

What’s an artist’s favorite mode of transportation? A paint van.

Art is all about finding the inner-peace of mind

Art is all about finding the inner-peace of mind.

Why don’t artists like fast food_ It's not their taste of palette

Why don’t artists like fast food? It’s not their taste of palette.

I’m getting a sense of déjà-view from this painting

I’m getting a sense of déjà-view from this painting.

Why did the artist go to prison_ He had a brush with the law

Why did the artist go to prison? He had a brush with the law.

I'm not a great artist, but I can picture us together

I’m not a great artist, but I can picture us together.

How do you know an artist is successful_ They draw a big crowd

How do you know an artist is successful? They draw a big crowd.

When you can’t find the sunshine, be the sunshine in your painting

When you can’t find the sunshine, be the sunshine in your painting.

What do you call an artist who sculpts with ice_ A cool artist

What do you call an artist who sculpts with ice? A cool artist.

Art is a way of survival—it's about making your canvas.

Art is a way of survival—it’s about making your canvas.

How do artists do in school_ They’re great at drawing conclusions

How do artists do in school? They’re great at drawing conclusions.

Never leaf a painting unfinished

Never leaf a painting unfinished.

What do you call an artist who uses cheese in their artwork_ Gouda at art

What do you call an artist who uses cheese in their artwork? Gouda at art.

Are you a painting_ Because I can't take my eyes off you

Are you a painting? Because I can’t take my eyes off you.

Why did the artist eat his paint_ He felt his life needed more color

Why did the artist eat his paint? He felt his life needed more color.

Don’t just make an impression—leave a stroke!

Don’t just make an impression—leave a stroke!

What do you call a painting done by a cat_ A paw-trait

What do you call a painting done by a cat? A paw-trait.

There's an art to knowing when to keep painting

There’s an art to knowing when to keep painting.

How do you cheer up an artist_ Give them an en-canvas-ing hug

How do you cheer up an artist? Give them an en-canvas-ing hug.

Why go to a gallery when I can just look at you_ You’re a masterpiece

Why go to a gallery when I can just look at you? You’re a masterpiece.

Why do painters always fall for their models_ They find them picture-perfect

Why do painters always fall for their models? They find them picture-perfect.

Keep your friends close and your paints closer.

Keep your friends close and your paints closer.

What do you call an artist who loves math_ A graphic designer

What do you call an artist who loves math? A graphic designer.

Watercolor you doing today_ Painting, I hope!

Watercolor you doing today? Painting, I hope!

Why did the artist stare at the can of tomato soup_ He hoped it would inspire another Campbell’s soup can painting!

Why did the artist stare at the can of tomato soup? He hoped it would inspire another Campbell’s soup can painting!

Artists are never board—they always have a canvas to work on.

Artists are never board—they always have a canvas to work on.

Written by Gabriel Cruz - Foodie, Animal Lover, Slang & Language Enthusiast

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