Pizza Puns and Jokes

Slice, slice, baby!

Slice, slice, baby!

What does a pizza say when it introduces itself_ Slice to meet you!

What does a pizza say when it introduces itself? Slice to meet you!

You've stolen a pizza my heart.

You’ve stolen a pizza my heart.

What type of person doesn’t like pizza_ A weir-dough!

What type of person doesn’t like pizza? A weir-dough!

This might be too cheesy, but I think you're grate.

This might be too cheesy, but I think you’re grate.

What does pizza wear to smell good_ Calzogne

What does pizza wear to smell good? Calzogne.

In crust we trust!

In crust we trust!

How do you fix a broken pizza_ With tomato paste

How do you fix a broken pizza? With tomato paste.

Pizza_ The wheel deal

Pizza: The wheel deal.

Why did the pizza go to therapy_ It had too many topping issues

Why did the pizza go to therapy? It had too many topping issues.

You've got a pizza my soul.

You’ve got a pizza my soul.

What’s a pizza maker’s favorite song_ Slice, Slice Baby

What’s a pizza maker’s favorite song? Slice, Slice Baby.

Are you a pizza_ Because everyone wants a slice!

Are you a pizza? Because everyone wants a slice!

Why was the pizza so good at the job interview_ It brought a lot of delivery to the table

Why was the pizza so good at the job interview? It brought a lot of delivery to the table.

Doughn't you know, I love pizza.

Doughn’t you know, I love pizza.

Why did the pizza go to college_ To get a little saucier

Why did the pizza go to college? To get a little saucier.

Let's get saucy.

Let’s get saucy.

What does a pizza say when it wants to cuddle_ Fold me close

What does a pizza say when it wants to cuddle? Fold me close.

Keep your friends close and your pizza closer.

Keep your friends close and your pizza closer.

What’s the difference between a pizza and my pizza jokes_ My pizza jokes can’t be topped!

What’s the difference between a pizza and my pizza jokes? My pizza jokes can’t be topped!

A slice a day keeps the sadness away.

A slice a day keeps the sadness away.

Why do pizzas never tell secrets_ They’d hate to be overheard and eaten!

Why do pizzas never tell secrets? They’d hate to be overheard and eaten!

You can't top pizza.

You can’t top pizza.

What did the parmesan say when it broke up with the mozzarella_ Sorry, but I am too mature for you

What did the parmesan say when it broke up with the mozzarella? Sorry, but I am too mature for you.

Cheese it, it’s the cops!

Cheese it, it’s the cops!

How can you tell if a pizza is rich_ If it has lots of dough

How can you tell if a pizza is rich? If it has lots of dough.

Avoid the noid, embrace the pizza.

Avoid the noid, embrace the pizza.

Why don’t skeletons fight each other_ They don’t have the stomach for pizza

Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the stomach for pizza.

Let’s face it, pizza is just too gouda.

Let’s face it, pizza is just too gouda.

What did the pizza say to the delivery guy_ You don’t pepper-own me

What did the pizza say to the delivery guy? You don’t pepper-own me.

Pizza in the morning, pizza in the evening, pizza at supper time!

Pizza in the morning, pizza in the evening, pizza at supper time!

Why do pizzas like phone cases_ Because they can't handle the toppings

Why do pizzas like phone cases? Because they can’t handle the toppings.

What’s up dough

What’s up dough?

Why did the hipster burn his lips_ He ate his pizza before it was cool

Why did the hipster burn his lips? He ate his pizza before it was cool.

Let's crust and chill.

Let’s crust and chill.

What do pizzas wear to go to sleep_ Pajama John's

What do pizzas wear to go to sleep? Pajama John’s.

Life happens, pizza helps.

Life happens, pizza helps.

How do you fix a broken pizza_ With tomato paste

How do you fix a broken pizza? With tomato paste.

Have a slice day!

Have a slice day!

Why did the tomato turn red_ Because it saw the salad dressing and the pizza undressing!

Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing and the pizza undressing!

This may be cheesy, but I think you're grate.

This may be cheesy, but I think you’re grate.

What did one pizza slice say to the other_ You wanna pizza me

What did one pizza slice say to the other? You wanna pizza me?

Pizza_ The pie that binds us

Pizza: The pie that binds us.

How does a pizza flirt_ It gives cheesy lines

How does a pizza flirt? It gives cheesy lines.

A little slice of heaven.

A little slice of heaven.

Why was the pizzeria desperate_ It needed the dough

Why was the pizzeria desperate? It needed the dough.

Never trust someone who doesn’t like pizza.

Never trust someone who doesn’t like pizza.

Why did the man go into the pizza business_ He wanted to make some dough

Why did the man go into the pizza business? He wanted to make some dough.

Be nice or leaven.

Be nice or leaven.

Why was the pizza so small_ Because it was a mini-pizza!

Why was the pizza so small? Because it was a mini-pizza!

No matter how you slice it, pizza's a winner.

No matter how you slice it, pizza’s a winner.

What’s a dog’s favorite pizza_ Pupperoni!

What’s a dog’s favorite pizza? Pupperoni!

I pepper-only have eyes for you!

I pepper-only have eyes for you!

Why did the pizza chef go to jail_ He got caught smuggling dough

Why did the pizza chef go to jail? He got caught smuggling dough.

Every pizza is a personal pizza if you believe in yourself.

Every pizza is a personal pizza if you believe in yourself.

How do you describe an Australian pizza_ It has koala-ty toppings

How do you describe an Australian pizza? It has koala-ty toppings.

Do you want a pizza me

Do you want a pizza me?

What did the pizza say to the ingredient_ I never sausage a beautiful topping!

What did the pizza say to the ingredient? I never sausage a beautiful topping!

The last slice is always the hardest goodbye.

The last slice is always the hardest goodbye.

What kind of pizza do you order on Christmas_ Cheeses Crust

What kind of pizza do you order on Christmas? Cheeses Crust.

You've stolen a pizza my heart.

You’ve stolen a pizza my heart.

What do you call a pizza with just peppers_ A pepper-only pizza

What do you call a pizza with just peppers? A pepper-only pizza.

Olive pizza very much.

Olive pizza very much.

Why did the mushroom get invited to all the pizza parties_ Because he’s such a fungi!

Why did the mushroom get invited to all the pizza parties? Because he’s such a fungi!

Don't go bacon my heart, have a pizza.

Don’t go bacon my heart, have a pizza.

What do pizza lovers order at the bar_ Dough-vermouth on the rocks

What do pizza lovers order at the bar? Dough-vermouth on the rocks.

I'm in the mood for a pizza that.

I’m in the mood for a pizza that.

What’s a pizza’s favorite movie_ Pie Hard

What’s a pizza’s favorite movie? Pie Hard.

Pizza has a pizza my heart

Pizza has a pizza my heart.

Why did the pizza start a fight_ Because it was feeling crusty

Why did the pizza start a fight? Because it was feeling crusty.

I'm all about that base

I’m all about that base.

What’s a pizza’s favorite philosophy book_ _Knead and Existentialism

What’s a pizza’s favorite philosophy book? “Knead and Existentialism.”

When it comes to pizza, the crust is a must.

When it comes to pizza, the crust is a must.

What do you call a sleeping pizza_ a piZZZZa

What do you call a sleeping pizza? a piZZZZa.

Pizza goals_ always be upper crust

Pizza goals: always be upper crust.

What did the pizza say after a long day_ _That’s a wrap!

What did the pizza say after a long day? “That’s a wrap!”

Feeling crust-frated without my pizza.

Feeling crust-frated without my pizza.

Why did the pizza go to school_ To improve its _slice_ skills

Why did the pizza go to school? To improve its “slice” skills.

It's pizza o'clock somewhere.

It’s pizza o’clock somewhere.

What did the pepperoni say to the mozzarella_ _You're the only one for me!

What did the pepperoni say to the mozzarella? “You’re the only one for me!”

My love for pizza isn't just a phase.

My love for pizza isn’t just a phase.

How do you fix a broken pizza slice_ With cheese and trust

How do you fix a broken pizza slice? With cheese and trust.

What’s round, delicious, and addictive_ You guessed it!

What’s round, delicious, and addictive? You guessed it!

Why do pizzas make good detectives_ They always find the slice of evidence

Why do pizzas make good detectives? They always find the slice of evidence.

Party like a pizza star.

Party like a pizza star.

Why did the pizza slice bring sunscreen_ It didn’t want to get too baked!

Why did the pizza slice bring sunscreen? It didn’t want to get too baked!

Cheesus Crust, that's good!

Cheesus Crust, that’s good!

What’s a pizza’s worst enemy_ The cutting board

What’s a pizza’s worst enemy? The cutting board.

Sometimes you just knead pizza.

Sometimes you just knead pizza.

How do you get a party started_ Tell a saucy pizza joke!

How do you get a party started? Tell a saucy pizza joke!

Mozzarella is always the answer. What was the question

Mozzarella is always the answer. What was the question?

What do pizzas do on Halloween_ They go pepperghouling

What do pizzas do on Halloween? They go pepperghouling.

This pizza is so good, it’s surreal.

This pizza is so good, it’s surreal.

What do you get if you cross a pie and a snake_ A python

What do you get if you cross a pie and a snake? A python.

Life's too short for bad pizza.

Life’s too short for bad pizza.

How does a pizza propose_ With an onion ring

How does a pizza propose? With an onion ring.

Call me a pizza cutter because I'm on a roll.

Call me a pizza cutter because I’m on a roll.

Why did the pizza lose the race_ It couldn't ketchup!

Why did the pizza lose the race? It couldn’t ketchup!

Pizza_ Because sometimes, it's okay to be round

Pizza: Because sometimes, it’s okay to be round.

What do you call an honest pizza_ Pure and yeast-free

What do you call an honest pizza? Pure and yeast-free

Written by Gabriel Cruz - Foodie, Animal Lover, Slang & Language Enthusiast

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