100 Weekend Jokes to Lighten Up Your Mood and Make You Laugh

Welcome to “100 Weekend Jokes to Lighten Up Your Mood and Make You Laugh,” the perfect place to find your dose of weekend cheer! As we bid adieu to the hustle and bustle of the workweek, what better way to usher in the bliss of Saturday and Sunday than with laughter? From puns that will have you groaning in delight to quips that capture the weekend spirit, we’ve compiled a list of 100 jokes to keep the giggles going.

Whether you’re winding down on a lazy Sunday afternoon or getting fired up for a Friday night, our collection is guaranteed to have something that tickles your funny bone. Laughter is not just a great way to bond with loved ones, but it’s also beneficial for your health, acting as a stress-reliever, immunity booster, and mood lifter all in one. So, as you transition into weekend mode, let these carefully crafted jokes spread joy and light-heartedness.

In this blog, you’ll find all manner of weekend-themed jests—from the clever play on weekdays to the humorous contrast between our love for Saturdays and our dread for the impending Monday. Whether you’re looking for a joke to share at a weekend barbecue, a line to brighten up your social media, or just a way to make your family laugh over breakfast, you’ve come to the right place. So grab your favorite beverage, kick back, and enjoy a hearty laugh with our weekend joke extravaganza. After all, laughter is the best weekend plan!

1. Why don’t weekends get along with the weekdays? Because weekdays are all work and no play, and weekends are the other way around!
2. Why did Saturday and Sunday stop hanging out? Because Sunday always had to be the end of the fun.
3. How do weekends pay their bills? With Sunday checks!
4. Why did the man throw his clock out the window every Friday night? He wanted to see time fly into the weekend!
5. What’s the weekend’s favorite game? Bored games – because there’s no work involved!
6. Why did the weekend break up with the calendar? It felt like their days were numbered.
7. How does Friday introduce itself to Monday? “Hi, I’m the reason everyone loves me and hates you.”
8. What do you call a well-dressed weekend? Sharp Saturday!
9. Why are weekends the smartest times of the week? Because they’re at the end of the day, they have the most “days” under their belt.
10. What did one weekend say to the long weekend? “Wow, you’ve got some extra days on me!”
11. Why did Sunday get an award? For being outstanding at the end of the week!
12. Why was the computer tired when it got to the weekend? It had too many tabs open Monday through Friday.
13. What did the weekend say to the circle of friends? “Let’s go around one more time!”
14. What’s a ghost’s favorite day of the week? Boo-sday!
15. Why did the week get so excited about the new movie? It was waiting for the “weekend release.”
16. How do you know weekends are into fashion? They always come at the end of the runway.
17. Why was the weekend a good musician? Because it had a good beat.
18. Why did Monday get a ticket? For following the weekend too closely.
19. What did the weekend say after a workout? “That’s enough stretching for two days!”
20. How does a potato start its weekend? By turning into a couch potato!
21. What’s the weekend’s favorite action movie? “Saturday Night Fever.”
22. Why was the weekend alone at the party? Because the days before it had all “week’d” out.
23. Why do weekends love puns? Because they can’t resist playing on words.
24. Why was the calendar depressed? Its days were numbered, especially weekends.
25. What do you call an adventurous weekend? A “Satventure.”
26. Why did the weekend visit an art gallery? To get a little more cultured before Monday.
27. What’s the weekend’s favorite type of music? Anything but “work” songs.
28. Why are weekends terrible at hide and seek? Because they always show up at the end.
29. What’s the difference between a pirate and a weekend? One says “Arrr!” and the other says “Ahh!”
30. Why did the week get jealous of the weekend? Because the weekend had a better “social” calendar.
31. Why don’t weekends like to argue? They prefer to end on a good note.
32. What’s a weekend’s life motto? Live for today, because tomorrow is a workday.
33. Why are weekends like rainbows? They look good after a stormy week.
34. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing for the weekend barbecue.
35. Why was Saturday a magician? It always follows a “Fri-day” night trick.
36. Why was Sunday a gardener? Because it always leaves the week with a flourish.
37. Why did Saturday get promoted? For working over time!
38. Why did the weekend wear sunglasses? Because it was so bright with possibilities.
39. Why did the weekend refuse to play cards? Because Monday was dealing.
40. How do you organize a space party? You planet for the weekend!
41. Why was the weekend so brave? Because it faced Monday without fear.
42. Why do weekends hate elevator music? Because it brings them down.
43. What do you call a weekend by the ocean? A high “tide” of relaxation.
44. Why did the weekend go to school? To be “classy.”
45. What do you call a fish on a weekend? A “fin” de semaine.
46. Why don’t weekends have a good memory? Because they always seem to fly by.
47. How does the weekend like its coffee? Like its Friday – casual and to the point.
48. What’s a weekend’s philosophy? “Don’t live the same year 52 times and call it a life.”
49. Why did the movie wait until the weekend to come out? Because it didn’t want to “work” the crowd.
50. What did the weekend say to the past week? “You’re history!”
51. Why do weekends love old buildings? Because they’re past their “week” of construction.
52. Why is Sunday the strongest day? Because the rest are weekdays!
53. What do you call a weekend stuck between two long workweeks? A “weakend.”
54. What’s a weekend’s favorite type of story? A short week-tale.
55. Why are weekends like a good soup? They’re both better with a little thyme.
56. Why did the weekend go to the doctor? It had a case of the “end-of-week-itis.”
57. Why are weekends bad at chess? Because they always look forward to the end game.
58. What’s a lazy weekend’s favorite type of exercise? Diddly-squats.
59. How do weekends apologize? They say, “Let’s not end on a bad note.”
60. Why did the weekend go to space? To enjoy some time off the Earth.
61. Why do weekends make good detectives? They always have the end in sight.
62. What’s the weekend’s favorite comfort food? Saturday-morning cereal.
63. Why do weekends get cold feet? Because they can’t last forever.
64. Why did the weekend get a trophy? For outstanding performance in leisure.
65. What did the weekend say to its over-packed schedule? “Let’s spread out a bit.”
66. How did the weekend win the race? It sprinted past Friday night!
67. Why do weekends make bad secret agents? Because they always give away the end.
68. Why did the weekend take a yoga class? To unwind from the tight schedule.
69. What’s a weekend’s favorite type of getaway? A briefcase escape.
70. Why was the weekend puzzle easy to solve? It was always just about to end.
71. What do you call a well-rested weekend? Sundayzzzz.
72. Why do weekends make the best chefs? They always know how to unwind a recipe.
73. What do weekends and trampolines have in common? Both are great for a good bounce back!
74. Why was the weekend worried about going to the ATM? Because it heard that Monday was on the horizon.
75. Why did the weekend refuse to play football? It was saving its goals for personal time.
76. How do weekends greet each other? “Happy to see you again!”
77. Why did the weekend cross the road? To get one day closer to Monday.
78. What’s a weekend’s least favorite candy? Anything with “work” in it, like “Work-er’s Original.”
79. Why was the weekend called to jury duty? To decide the fate of the ‘case of Mondays.’
80. How did the weekend keep its balance? By evening out the fun.
81. Why do weekends love puns? Because they play on words while everyone else is off playing.
82. What’s a weekend’s least favorite drill? The Monday morning alarm.
83. How does a weekend break up with a bad habit? By saying, “Let’s call it a day!”
84. Why do weekends make bad baristas? They always give away too many breaks.
85. Why did the weekend love the new movie? Because it was a great escape from the weekday plot.
86. How do weekends follow a diet? By deciding to cheat days in advance.
87. What do you call a group of weekends? A break bunch.
88. Why do weekends make good comedians? They always know when to take a day off.
89. Why did the weekend buy a boat? To sail past Monday.
90. What’s the weekend’s favorite snack? A “break” bar.
91. How does a weekend keep its hair in place? With a Saturday cap.
92. Why are weekends like good jokes? They’re all about the timing.
93. Why did the weekend get a library card? To check out a little “me time.”
94. What’s a weekend’s least favorite song? “Workin’ 9 to 5.”
95. Why did the weekend love spring? Because it’s the best time to “spring” into relaxation.
96. Why did the weekend use a pencil? Because it always draws closer to Monday.
97. How do weekends win at poker? They always play their best “days” last.
98. Why do weekends make good lawyers? They’re excellent at negotiating time off.
99. What did the weekend say to the alarm clock? “Give me a break!”
100. Why do weekends love to sail? Because they’re close to the “sea-ze the day!”